In 1978 the only type of phone you could find in our house were the ones that mounted on the wall with the extra long cord that was purchased separately. It would get so tangled up and coiled that you had to hold the phone upside down and let it spin to uncoil.
In the 80s we were all impressed by the obnoxious cordless with the antennae that could basically touch outer space. I still remember my mom barbecuing in her black one piece by the pool on ours while chatting it up with one of her sisters about one of her other sisters. Ha! Oh the memories.
In the 90s we thought we were too cool for school with the bag phone. That’s right, a bag with a phone in it. (I know. It sounds as foreign as a pay phone to some of you). And that phone came with a price, a hefty one. A price that if you used it for anything other than emergencies, your parents had to take out a second mortgage to pay the bill. I may or may not have been accused of using said phone for something other than emergencies…
Then the millennium brought us cell phones. Now keep in mind only because they were not in a bag didn’t mean they were any cheaper. I still had to use a 1-800 number my mom purchased for us to call home when we were away at college. I remember when I had a D&G gold flip phone and couldn’t send a text to save my life. God help you if you sent ME a text. You probably wouldn’t get a response for at least 45 mins and if you did it was “Hi!” That’s right it took all that time for me to get that response out.
It wasn’t until 2007 that Apple’s coveted iPhone was introduced. Oh that fancy glass screen and massive app store. How you stole our hearts. Yup, that was only 7 years ago folks. Seems like the dark ages now.
So with the popularity of the iPhone and other smart phones came not only faster texts from me but words that are not English. True, they can now earn you points in scrabble but are by no means proper English. Example: OMG, Adorbs, selfie and let’s not forget twerk or twerking. My Microsoft word still doesn’t recognize it yet we use these words in daily convos, (ha) all the time.
So to keep up with the times, you have to know all your “words”. You have to know what “trending” means. “Trending”? What the hell is “trending”? Good question. Something I did not know the answer to until recently. Let me back up. My degree is in Microbiology (I know shocking) and when I was in college we did not use computers. (Don’t faint now) My one and only computer class was about learning how to use Microsoft Work and Excel and I still can’t figure out those damn lines and columns. Plus, I spent most of my time with either an eyeball in a scope or taking tail bleeds from white mice that as an animal lover don’t quite know what happened to those little fellas when we were done with them. (Ouch)
So the official meaning: trending is a word that is used when the whole universe is talking about something. For example, the Oscars were “trending” last week. But it’s not enough to know what’s trending; you have to know what’s trending on twitter, trending hashtags, trending styles, etc. Then you have to break those down. Trending hashtags on twitter, trending hashtags on instagram and so on. And if all THAT wasn’t enough, Facebook launched it’s own trending topics on the web with descriptions of why each are popular. For something that is supposed to make our lives quicker and easier, it sure is a lot to keep up with.
So what’s “trending” now. Well, that depends on which avenue you want to go down. On twitter, Phil Jackson may be returning to the NBA. WHAAAAAAATT??!!??!! Let me explain. 1) I care about this because I am a HUGE Laker fan. Don’t believe me? My first born dog is named Kobe Bryant Dorchak. He has his own jersey and everything. Whateves, ha! 2) Phil was asked to be a coach on the sideline but he turned that down. And 3) He would be part of the front office. I’m sorry what? Phil Jackson is being offered a job in a front office? Is he going to make coffee and confirm appointments? Not exactly. In this “front office” he would be making final decisions when it comes to coaching. So what team is he considering being an office manager for? The NY Knicks. Hmmmm. Am I sad that he will be returning to the NBA and not to the Lakers? Of course I am. The Lakers are and have been struggling. Phil, if you’re reading this, I had no idea you liked shoes so much and we really should meet. I feel we have way more in common than first expected. (wink).
“Trending” on facebook is Tonight Show Celebrity Photobomb with Jimmy Fallon and Jon Hamm. I’m not going to lie at first I didn’t know who Jon Hamm was (sorry) and wasn’t sure if Jimmy was photobombing Jon. (Yes we are all on a first name basis). Photobomb is also one of those “new” words for those of you scrabble fans. When I looked up the video for this photobombing incident, I found it to be pretty hysterical and quite inspiring. It inspired me to try this new photobombing phenomenon. Look out vacation sunsets in Cabo. You are no longer safe, ha!
By the time you read this, these 2 topics may not be “trending” anymore. You see, “trends” change as constantly and as fast as our present world. In other words, one minute we can be talking about Phil and Jimmy and the next be talking about an earthquake or who the Bachelor picked. Do I feel that this year’s bachelor was and is a total jerk? Totes McGotes!